Hello and welcome back. Sorry it has been so long. Anyway on to the story.
We help run a pain management clinic in the morning at my hospital, yeah its mine.
We provide x-ray visualization for certain types of nerve blocks. Which is when a steroid or a numbing medicine are injected directly into a joint space that is causing a person pain. On any given day we do about 5 per morning. They take about 15 mins and they are an OUTPATIENT procedure.
These blocks are done in this sequence:
Numb the skin
Insert needle
Take x-ray to guide the needle placement
Reach the joint
Inject medicine
Pull everything out
Wave at patient as they leave.
So a couple of days ago we brought in this thick necked, barrel chested tough guy.
He was about 6'4" 240 lbs, he had a buzzed haircut and tatoos on both forearms. One was a skull and the other was lightning coming out of a dark cloud. Mean looking.
The patient strutted in like Vinny Baberino as if he was sizing up everyone in the room. Turns out, he was a cop, or as HE put it,"Yeah I'm on da force."
His main complaint was lower back pain, like most of our patients. We were just going to inject one level of his spine. Normally we do at least two.
We got him on the x-ray table, cleaned off his back with some betadine, took and x-ray to see where he hurt, took the smallest needle we have, injected a tiny bit of lidocaine (the stuff a dentist uses to numb your mouth) into his back.......and he jumps off the table. LITERALLY! Jumped off and said in a high pitched squeal,"F-this man!!! My back don't hurt bad enough to put up with this crap....." and stormed out of the exam room. Never to be seen again. The room was silent with four stunned Drs. and one giggling tech. I have NEVER seen anyone not be able to "handle" the lidocaine. To give you an idea of how much this cop over-reacted the ninety lbs. eighty year old lady that went after him handled her THREE levels without so much as a whimper.
Next time I get stopped by a cop, and I WILL be pulled over again, I am going to be chuckling to myself just a little bit.
G-Lo
