Sunday, July 1, 2007

Might as well JUMP!!!


Hello everyone,

About six years ago I was called into the trauma room to take x-rays of a man who had
attempted suicide by jumping off a building. Feet first. From three stories up. Well needless to say he didn't die. He shattered both ankles though. When I walked into the trauma room he was laying unconscious, strapped to a back board holding perfectly still. First, I took a chest x-ray, then a neck x-ray and I started on some lower leg films. I carefully slide my x-ray film under his leg and he woke up. PISSED! I wasn't sure if he was mad because I hurt him by lifting his leg which was twisted the wrong way or because he wasn't dead. Anyway he start yelling over and over,"Let me up, I'm outta here. Let me the F*** up!! I gotta get out of here!!!" and when I say over and over I mean like 15 SOLID minutes of this. Continuously!!! Those of you who know me might know that I really dislike needless repetition. So I start getting irritated. I tried talking to him but it was no use Sooooo..... I started messing with him. I finished all my x-rays then I unbuckled his back board straps and said," You wanna go? You wanna leave....go. Get the hell up and go. If you make it to the door, I will GIVE you a ride home!!!" He sat up, looked down at his legs, saw that his feet were pointing in all the wrong directions and promptly passed the hell out. I put this safety straps back on a went about my business. As I was leaving I high-fived the Orthopedic resident because he had the evil job of realigning the guy's legs. Can I just tell you, that's a new kind of pain. The kind of pain that might one wish they were dead. I felt bad for the guy but not REAL bad.

Bye guys.

Gonzo